


it was a great love (one for the ages)

by bysunandcandlelight



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Addison divorces Derek and goes for the girl instead :), Bisexual Addison Montgomery, Bisexual Meredith Grey, Derek is the number 1 merddison shipper, F/F, theyre so cute ajskdjsk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:42:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 13,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27834730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bysunandcandlelight/pseuds/bysunandcandlelight
Summary: prompt: "dude i was just thinking about the power addison and meredith would have if they got together" - my friend via iMessageaka Addison and Meredith dumps/ divorces Derek, and they date each other instead
Relationships: Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery
Comments: 68
Kudos: 144





	1. Seattle

Her heels clicked on the shiny floor as she entered Seattle Grace Memorial Hospital. It was clear to her that she hadn’t thought this through. One moment, she was sitting in the comfort of her own Manhattan home, in a dark, cold room that has been drained of all its happy memories. Before she could blink, she was hopping on a plane to Seattle, Washington.

The first thing she noticed was that it was quieter here. Visitors, day shift nurses, and doctors began to make their way home to see their own families and rest after a long work day. The sky was dark, the air was crisp and smelled like rain. It would be calming to her… if not for the reason she came to Seattle in the first place.

She walked through the large entrance of Seattle Grace, standing tall and raised her chin as her long red hair swished back and forth. A quick glance to her right, and… there. There he was, with his maroon sweater and signature dark curly hair, adjusting the jacket of a tall blonde woman. They were standing a little too close for Addison’s comfort.

As he picked up his pack and turned around, all the blood drained from his face. She smirked and made her way over.

“Meredith, I’m so sorry,” she heard Derek mumble to the blonde woman. Addison keeps her eyes on Derek.

“Hi. What are you doing here?” He smiled, but it was clear to Addison that it wasn't warm.  
“Well, you’d know if you bothered to return any one of my phone calls,” she remarked.  
She turns to the woman, sticking out her hand.

“Hi. I’m Addison Shepherd.”  
The woman's cold, elegant fingers wrapped around Addison’s warm hands. She stared softly at Addison’s face, looking dazed and confused. It was kind of cute... not that Addison would admit it.

“‘Shepherd’?” Meredith said finally.  
Addison’s lip twitched up at the corners. “And you must be the woman who’s been screwing my husband.”

Derek stared hard into her eyes. _“Don’t do this”_ his eyes said.  
Addison raised her eyebrow. _Oh, honey. I’m just getting started._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all the dialogue in this chapter are direct quotes from Grey's Anatomy. I wrote this chapter while watching the episode and I'm currently using them for reference. All the credit goes to the Grey's Anatomy writers :)


	2. Let's talk

“Addison, what are you doing here?” Derek asked.  
“Your hair’s different,” she observed. It was long and wavy, almost touching the back of his neck.  
“A lot of things are different,” he remarked.  
“It’s longer. I like it. It’s very Russell Crowe.” Addison raises her hand to twirl a strand of Derek’s hair around her finger.

“What are you doing here?”  
“What are you doing here? You just pick up and leave everything-- your house, your practice, your friends? You had a life in Manhattan-”  
“ _Had_ ,” Derek emphasised.

Addison stares dead into the faded blue of his eyes. “And now you have a girlfriend in Seattle,” she said softly. “She seems… sweet.”  
Derek turns to walk away. “The ice you’re on-- thin.”  
“She’s young,” Addison said without turning around. “The whole wide-eyed, ‘ooh, he’s a brain surgeon’ thing happening, but still sweet, which is what you were going for, right? The anti-Addison?” She turned around, smirking. 

Derek scoffs. “If you came out here to try to win me back, you can forget about it.”  
“I did. I flew all the way across the country to reminisce over wedding photos, get drunk, fall into bed, make you realize you can’t live without me,” she added with a hint of sarcasm. “Relax, Derek. I’m here for work.” 

It wasn’t a total lie. She got a call from Richard Webber, the Chief of Surgery about a T.T.T.S. case that was admitted the week before. Granted, there were… other things that made Addison agree to come visit the Pacific Northwest. 

“...and from Richard’s briefing, I should be--”  
“Richard knew you were coming out here?” Derek cut her off.  
“He asked me to come. Didn’t he tell you?”  
“No, he didn’t.”  
“Hmm. Well, surprise.” Addison leans closer to Derek’s ear.  
“The hair though… you know I’ve always had a thing for Russell Crowe,” she teased and walked away, leaving Derek standing in the middle of the lobby.

\---

“...And the husband was the worst!” Addison laughs. Richard joins in with a big belly laugh before suddenly cutting off. Addison, confused, turns around and sees Derek standing in the doorway. She hears Derek clear his throat and looks down at the ground before continuing.

“Well, I will be back in the morning to report for duty. And you,” she kisses Richard’s head. “Get some rest.”

Addison stood up, walking back out the same way she came in, but not before hearing Derek mumble something to Richard. _Something_ , being about her. She sighs, starting to regret saying yes. Of course she’d help out a fellow colleague, but this was all too much. Her heart hammered in her chest and she picked up the pace, nearly jogging out the hospital to drive home to get some sleep. Well… not home, exactly. Even home didn’t feel like home.

\---

The next morning, she wakes up early and gets ready. After finishing her breakfast-- poached eggs and toast-- she begins the drive to the hospital. Rush hour began picking up, more and more cars pulling up behind her to get to work. Any regret she had last night was resolved with some wine (just one glass, she had surgery the next day), a hot bath, and a soft bed to fight off her jet lag. 

After pulling on some pink scrubs and picking up her pager, she finds her way to Dr. Burke. And, of course, Derek was there, mumbling something about "we're separated" to Dr. Burke. 

“Sorry to interrupt, Dr. Burke,” she greets him.  
“You’re never interrupting,” he smiles back at her.  
“You’re always interrupting,” Derek mutters under his breath. How mature.  
Addison smiles sweetly. “I was just checking to see if Dr. Burke secured the in--”

“Intern. You requested”  
A warm, familiar voice finishes for her. Addison looks up, and there she was. Meredith Grey. The woman that has been screwing her husband. And she was… gorgeous.  


She had wide blue eyes, more on the silver side but blue nonetheless. Her dirty blonde hair was swept across on both sides of her head, framing the soft heart shape of her face. Clearly, Addison didn’t have much memory of last night due to the jet lag from the 6 hour flight. Well, here she was now. Standing in front of _Meredith Grey _.__

__Addison should hate her. Make her an enemy. But she couldn’t, and she didn’t know why. Honestly, she couldn’t blame Derek._ No, stop that, Addy. _

__Derek and Dr. Burke walks off, leaving her and Meredith staring off at each other in the middle of the hallway._ _

____

____

“Well, let’s get started, Dr. Grey,” Addison smiles at Meredith.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter coming up very soon!


	3. First Surgery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope this is good enough! had a lot of homework to do this week but i'm looking forward to writing more this weekend!

“Define T.T.T.S,” Addison instructed. 

Addison and Dr. Grey were in Julie Phillips’s room, preparing her for surgery. 

“Twin-twin transfusion syndrome. Conjoined fetal twins,” Dr. Grey replied.  
“Connected by?”  
“Blood vessels in the placenta.”  
“Meaning?” Addison pressed.  
Dr. Grey cleared her throat but stayed silent.  
“One twin gets too much blood, the other too little, endangering the lives of both.” Addison finishes for her. “I’d expect you to know that, Grey.” She looks up at Meredith, raising her eyebrow.  
Julie speaks up.  
“You told me there wasn’t much chance that anything could be done, but--”  
“T.T.T.S. is usually impossible to correct, unless you happen to be one of the handful of surgeons in the world who knows how to separate fetal blood vessels, which, luckily for you, I am.” Addison reassured her. “So, we’re gonna get you into surgery tomorrow. If you have any questions at all, please ask Dr. Grey.”  
Addison picks up the chart and walks to the door.

“From what I have seen, she is one of the hospital’s most _popular _interns.”__

__Meredith catches up quickly behind Addison._ _

__“_ Dr. Shepherd _.”  
Addison freezes in her tracks.  
“You know, I could’ve answered that question if you had given me the chance,” Meredith sighs.  
“Chin up, Grey. I’m this tough on everyone, not just women who sleep with my husband,” Addison teased.__

__She walks away, leaving Meredith shaking her head and going back into the room._ _

__\---_ _

__“See? Bilateral pleural effusion with evidence of sub-q edema.”_ _

__Addison and Dr. Grey was back in Julie’s room, looking at the ultrasound monitor._ _

__“In English, please?” Julie asked worriedly.  
Addison sets her hands down from where they were pointing at the monitor.  
“We’ve detected what looks like beginning heart failure in the twins. Don’t be alarmed--”  
“Are my babies going to be okay?”  
“I’m gonna take you into surgery right now, we’re not wasting any time.”  
Addison looks at Meredith.  
“Book an O.R.”  
Meredith doesn’t budge.  
“Move!” Addison walks out of the room. Perhaps she had said that too forcefully. Well, what’s done is done._ _

__\---_ _

__Addison was in O.R. 4, beginning the procedure on Julie Phillips’s twins._ _

__“We’re going in laparoscopically. You’re not going to feel anything, neither are your twins,” Addison reassured her._ _

__“Okay, begin with a 3-millimeter incision.”_ _

__As she started cutting, she swore she could feel Meredith staring holes into the side of her face. It was… well, she didn’t know how to describe it. Comforting? Weird?_ Focus, Addy. You can’t afford to be distracted right now _. She cleared her mind and went on with the procedure.__

__She was just starting to put in the laparoscope when she couldn’t handle the staring anymore.  
“How are you doing there, Grey?” Addison spoke with a teasing but professional tone.  
Meredith shakes back into reality.  
“Good. I- I’m good.” She looks down to the floor and shakes her head.  
Addison smiles softly. Thank god for her mask covering her mouth._ _

__\---_ _

__“Your babies are doing very well,” Addison tells Julie. The procedure was done a couple hours later. “See? Just a small scar. And Dr. Grey will be back to check on you later.”_ _

__Julie shifts in her bed, the sheets wrinkling. “Actually, I’d prefer it if Dr. Grey were taken off the case.”  
Addison looks back and forth between Julie and Meredith. “Why, is there a problem?”  
Julie shrugs. “Just reminds me of someone I don’t like very much-- someone my husband likes a lot, particularly in lingerie. You understand.”_ _

__Addison starts feeling defensive. “No… no, I don’t understand,” she says tentatively.  
“Well, she’s sleeping with your husband, right?”  
Addison inhales. “Ms. Phillips… I lack Dr. Grey’s class and patience, so let me get this record straight.” Addison looks over at Meredith, who is standing against the wall in a tense, straight line.  
“My husband didn’t cheat on me, I cheated on him. So, the wronged woman here-- Dr. Grey.” Meredith looks up at Addison.  
“So, I think you owe her one _hell _of an apology,” Addison smiles forcefully and walks out the room. She sees Meredith’s eyes tracking her as she walks out the room, and Addison’s heart flutters. This was a new feeling. Not new, but it was a feeling she hadn’t felt since meeting Derek. Addison pushes past the door of the nearest on-call room and attempts to take a nap to clear her mind. And yet, all she could think about was Meredith.__

__\---_ _

__Meanwhile, Meredith leans against her car right across from Derek, who is sitting on the porch of his trailer, drinking a beer._ _

__“... and then I met you.” Derek takes another sip from the bottle.  
They sit in silence, staring into each other's eyes.  
Meredith straightens up.  
“So what was I to you? Another girl you screwed to get over being screwed?”  
Derek pauses.  
“You were like coming up for fresh air. Like I was drowning, and you saved me. That’s all I know.”  
Meredith takes a long stare at him. She was feeling particularly brave at this moment. She had dealt with enough, and Derek lying straight to her face was the last straw._ _

__“That’s not enough,” she says finally. She hops into her car and drives away into the dark and rainy Seattle night._ _


	4. Starting Over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pretty short chapter but i really enjoyed writing this one! let me know what your thoughts are after reading it :)

Addison lies on the thin mattress in the on-call room, watching the faint lights of passing cars dance over the ceiling. Sleep didn’t come easy for her but after a quick nap, she was feeling lighter. She takes out her pager, finds Meredith’s name, and sends her a private message.

**9:41 pm  
On-call room 3  
Dr. A Shepherd**

16 blocks away, Meredith sits at a red light, on her way back to the hospital. Her pager buzzes, and she picks it up. Her heart skips a beat when she sees who the page was from. That, and, the guy behind her honking the horn. Meredith is temporarily blinded by the bright green stoplight and scrambles to start driving before she pisses off more people.

Addison wasn’t sure what caused her to send the page. Perhaps the nap gave her an extra boost of bravery. Or maybe it was just her tired brain. But she couldn’t stop feeling that giddy excitement like a kid on Christmas day. Her heart raced as she waited for Meredith to come through the door.

Meredith speed walks through Seattle Grace, her heart racing and shoes clomping against the linoleum floor with her quick footsteps. She finds on-call room 3, and bursts through the door. She is surprised when she sees Addison look up at her from the bottom bunk of the bed.

“What’s wrong?” Meredith said, breathless.  
Addison shrugs nonchalantly.  
“Nothing,” is all she says.  
Meredith narrows her eyebrows.  
“Then… why did you page me?”

 _Okay, Addy. This is the moment. There’s no backing out now _.__ Addison takes a deep breath.  
“I wanted to know if you’d like to go out for a drink.”  
She sees about 4 different emotions pass over Meredith’s face until it just narrowed down to confusion.  
“You… want to have a drink? With me?”  
Addison nods. “Yes. Maybe you can show me any good bars around here?”

Meredith’s stomach feels light and fluttery.  
“Uh… sure.”  
Addison smiles at her, genuinely smiles at her. Meredith smiles back, She wondered if this was a scheme to get back at her for sleeping with Addison’s husband. _No, it can’t be. Addison stood up for her in front of Julie earlier. Only one way to know for sure._

“Well,” Meredith starts. “There’s a bar my friends and I go to. And it’s right across the street.”

Addison makes a small hum noise at the back of her throat-- a chuckle?-- and Meredith nearly melts inside. She pushes the feelings away and tilts her head for Addison to follow her.

\---

The bar was crowded and noisy, people chatting with their friends and playing darts. Addison and Meredith sat down at the counter and ordered their drinks. The first few minutes was in awkward silence, sipping on their Cosmos that Addison had ordered for the both of them. Addison took one more gulp before speaking.

“I’d like to start over.”  
Meredith pauses to look at her, swallowing her drink.  
“Start… over?”  
Addison nods.  
“Yes.”  
They sit in silence for what felt like a million years. Addison admired how the lowlights of the bar gave Meredith a soft glow, not like the harsh white of the fluorescent lights inside Seattle Grace. Soft, blonde hair perfectly framing her face. Light blue sweater that made her eyes pop. Even in the dark bar, Meredith’s eyes shone like diamonds. Addison couldn’t tell what color it was. Green? Blue? Well, they were one of her most favorite sights in the world.

“I feel like we got off on the wrong foot. And, I mean, plus the whole… Derek thing,” Addison swallows the lump in her throat. “So, if it’s okay with you, I’d like to start over.”

Meredith stares at her the whole time, not knowing what to say to the new level of vulnerability Addison showed. When Addison finished her sentence, she turned over to look at Meredith and Meredith just-- went breathless.

The warm lights of the bar cast shadows over Addison’s face every time Joe walked past to tend to another customer. Addison’s hair was let down, flowing freely from the tight ponytail she had on during her shift at the hospital. Addison had changed clothes since the last time Meredith saw her. She was wearing a soft grey sweater tucked into black slacks. She looked beautiful.

Meredith smiles softly at Addison. “I’d like that.”  
Addison smiles back at her, raising her glass towards Meredith. “To starting over.”  
Meredith clinks her glass with Addison’s. “To starting over.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really liked writing this chapter! I'm slowly starting to create my own dialogue instead of using direct quotes from Grey's. I'm also incorporating Meredith's thoughts/ point of view and it was a lot of fun writing it!


	5. The Prettiest View Ever

Eight tequila shots, two Cosmos, and two rounds of darts later, Addison and Meredith stumble out the bar into the street, laughing and falling against each other. It was 12 am, the crowd inside the bar was slowly getting smaller and smaller.

Addison exhales, smiling. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Meredith looks up at her.

“Tonight. The drinks. I know we got off to a bad start, but… I had a lot of fun.”

They lock eyes, each of them getting lost in the other’s. 

Meredith bites her lip. “Of course.”

The cab Joe had ordered for them pulled up, bright headlights blinding the two women. Addison steps up, opening the door for Meredith.

“Goodnight. Get home safe,” Addison said softly.

Meredith smiles drunkenly. “Goodnight.”

Addison closes the door, keeping eye contact as long as she could while the car drove further away, taking Meredith with it. A warm, fuzzy feeling rises in Addison’s stomach. It was at this moment that she realized she had…  _ feelings _ for Meredith. That, or she needed to puke from the 4 tequila shots. Maybe both.

The second cab pulled up to the curb and Addison pressed her head against the window after giving the driver the address to the house she was renting out. Once the cab was in front of the house, Addison blindly climbs out and throws a $20 bill to the driver, thanking him for the ride. Haphazardly throwing her shoes and bag on the floor, she crashes into her cold bed, falling asleep wishing that Meredith was there with her.

\---

Across the city, Meredith is dropped off at her house. Izzie was fast asleep upstairs in her room, and George was sitting on the couch.

“Hey,” Meredith said. George looks up at her.

“Hey, didn’t hear you come in. Where’d you go?”

Meredith shrugs. “Oh, I got drinks with Addison.”

George abruptly sits up, the couch squeaking. Meredith winces, rubbing her head.

“ _ Addison?  _ As in, Derek’s wife, Addison?”

Meredith raises both her hands in surrender. “It wasn’t my idea. She paged me.”

George scoffs. “Are you sure it isn’t some sort of trap? You know, to get back at you?”

“No… no. She… I don’t think so, it seemed… genuine. And, I mean, she stood up for me at the hospital today, and before we left, she said she had a lot of fun.”

“She was drunk, Meredith.”

Well, George had a point. But the feeling in her gut told her that Addison meant well. But, honestly? She’d understand if Addison was just trying to get back at her. Meredith wouldn’t be too happy if she’d found out her husband was screwing another girl, either. She pinches the bridge of her nose.

“George, I… I have a headache, can we finish this conversation tomorrow?” she says, exasperated. 

George sighs. “Sure. I just want to protect you, Meredith.”

“I know, George. I know.” 

Meredith nearly collapses into George, hugging him. 

“Come on, let’s get you upstairs,” George drags Meredith up to her room.

In her lonely bed, Meredith stared at the empty side of the bed, only wishing for a certain redhead to occupy it. 

\---

Addison wakes up to the sun shining across her face.  _ Of course, of all days, the sun decided to come out today.  _ Addison grumbles, sitting up. Her stomach makes a weird turn, and she ends up hunched over the toilet. 

After taking a cold shower and grabbing a smoothie from her fridge, Addison puts on a pair of dark sunglasses and makes her way out the door. It was her day off, and she had two more days in Seattle until her flight back to New York. Was it weird to miss a city you’ve spent only 2 days in? Addison sighs.

Seattle is a nice change of scenery. Addison especially liked the lucious evergreen forests. Sure, New York had forests too, but from where she lived, she rarely saw any sign of plants. Here, plants were-- well,  _ everywhere.  _ Outside the house was a garden of the most colorful flowers she had ever seen. Large, green oak trees were placed on the sidewalks every 4 feet. 

Addison took a cab to the nearest supermarket and picked up a sandwich along with a tub of berries. After picking up her car from Joe’s bar, she drove herself to Kerry Park, singing along to the radio. 

When she makes it up the hill and stands behind the railing, her lungs stopped working. Meredith’s brief description of the park-- “the prettiest view ever,” she slurred from the tequila-- didn’t do it enough justice. It was absolutely _gorgeous._ It overlooked the entire city, the Space Needle smack dab in the middle of it, overtowering the other buildings in its front and background. The sky near the horizon was a deep prismarine blue, above it was a light blue. White fluffy clouds invaded the sky. Green trees covered the land below from where she was standing. And all that was missing was a gorgeous girl to share the view with.

Addison huffed, sitting down on the bench and opened up her lunch. The wind blew her hair across her face, tickling her nose. Then it hit her. She wasn’t going to miss the city when she leaves-- although, after seeing this view? She’ll miss it too-- she was going to miss Meredith. Addison shakes her head. _What are you talking about, Addison?_ _You’ve known her for two days!_

Well, the moment was ruined. Addison stuffed her lunch back inside her bag and said goodbye to the view. She drives all the way back to the house and absentmindedly turns on the TV to fill the deafening silence of her loneliness. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the format in this chapter looks different but i think i like it better :/ anyway i hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	6. Stay With Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the long wait! here's a slightly longer chapter to make up for it. happy holidays everyone!

It was the day Addison had to go back to New York. Her flight leaves at 4 pm, so she goes back to Seattle Grace for a visit to say goodbye. 

She went up to Richard's room, chatting for a bit and then thanked him for having her over. Next, she checked on the TTTS twins, and they are doing as good as ever. After a curt nod at Derek when she passed him in the halls, she saw the blonde standing at the nurses station, flipping through charts. Addison sighs and braces herself before walking over.

“Hey,” Addison said softly

Meredith jumps, clearly deep in thinking. 

Meredith regains her composure.

“Hi.”

Addison smiles. “So, my flight is leaving this afternoon.”

Meredith's face falls. “Oh. Okay.”

Meredith’s mind goes completely blank, yet at the same time is going a million miles a minute. __

They stand in silence, Meredith avoiding Addison’s eyes.

Meredith bites her lip.  _ This is crazy. You’ve known Addison for, what, 3 days? This is just a small crush. You can’t convince her to stay. _

“Well,” Addison breaks the silence. “I just wanted to say thank you for working with me on the twins case. I know I didn't give you much of a choice, but it was nice working with you.”

Meredith clears her throat. “Yeah, uhm-- thank you for the opportunity.”

Addison lowers her voice and rests her arm on the side of the counter. “And thank you for telling me about the park. It was relaxing. The view is beautiful.”

Meredith smiles back. “Yeah, of course. It’s a nice view. I go up there whenever I get the chance.”

Addison nods, leaning impossibly close to Meredith. “It’s a shame I didn’t have a beautiful girl with me to share the view with,” she winks, letting Meredith know that she was referring to her.

_ Oh, what the hell? This was probably the last time she was going to see Meredith. Why not have a little fun? _

Meredith blushes, her green eyes wide. Her mouth hangs open.

Addison waves, then walks into an empty elevator. Her heart beats fast in excitement and she smiles the whole way down to her car.

\--- 

Addison drums her fingers on the steering wheel, waiting for the traffic to die down. She’s been sitting in her car, on the same road for 10 minutes now. That’s when she notices-- it’s hard to hear at first over the honking of the cars in front of her, but the sirens of an ambulance got closer and closer. A whole fleet of ambulances rush past her car. There were maybe 10 of them, no doubt there were more en route.

The stoplight turns green, and Addison follows the ambulances without hesitation, her flight ticket falling onto the ground on the passenger side when she makes a sharp turn.

\---

Turns out, there was a ferry boat crash. Addison pulls her phone out of her purse and dials Richard’s number. She knows she’s not supposed to be on her phone while driving-- but this was too important to wait for.

Richard answers on the third ring. 

“Richard. There’s a--” 

Richard cuts her off. “Ferry boat crash, I know.” Richard hears the ambulances in the background on Addison’s side. “Aren’t you supposed to be at the airport right now?”

“Yes, but I saw the ambulances drive past and I’m following them to the crash site,” Addison says hurriedly. “Can I have privileges?”

Richard sighs. “Of course you can, it’s all hands on deck. Now get off your phone and  _ drive.” _

“Thank you!” Addison hangs up and tosses her phone on the passenger seat. 

\---

Two miles outside of Seattle Grace, Meredith sits in the back of ambulance 34 with Izzie, Alex, George, and Bailey. 

“When we get there, begin triaging. Assess carefully, tag and get all the critical patients into the ambulances as fast as possible. Don’t get in the way of search and rescue, and stay calm,” Dr. Bailey instructs.

“Any word on what happened?” Alex asks.

“All we know is there are multiple traumas.” Dr. Bailey sits up straight when the ambulance starts slowing down.

The five of them rush out the ambulance, all of them except Meredith immediately going to their stations to start working. Meredith stands near the ambulance, taking in the situation. Search and Rescue were rushing around, tents were set up with injured people inside. The sirens were loud, there was a lot of chattering. Some people scream out of pain, George and Izzie were talking with their patients to distract them. Some people lay on the ground quietly--  _ too _ quiet. 

“Grey! Don’t just stand there! Get to work!” Dr. Bailey yells from a few feet away. 

Meredith snaps back into reality and runs into the crowd, assessing everyone she could.

\---

Addison parks her car on the side of the street, tying up her hair and sanitizing her hands with the wipes she had in her emergency kit. She sees Miranda Bailey and jogs over to her. Thank god she didn’t choose to wear heels today. 

“Bailey!” 

Miranda turns around and spots her. “Aren’t you supposed to be-”

“-on a flight, yes.” Addison pants. “Where do you need me?”

Miranda waves her hand around. “Anywhere, get to anybody you can. You can grab some tags out of my bag.”

Addison thanks her and walks around, assessing each person carefully and tagging them. She sees Meredith kneeling on the ground, talking to a little girl who seems to be lost. Addison takes a deep breath, and gets back to work.

\---

A little while later, mostly everyone is accounted for, some of the Seattle Grace interns are still finishing up. Addison looks around to see if anyone else needs help when someone tugs on the hem of her blouse. She looks down, and it’s the same little girl she saw with Meredith earlier. Addison kneels down.

“Hey, are you still lost?”

The girl doesn’t say anything, but she keeps looking back at the water.

“Where was the doctor that was with you earlier?” Addison said softly.

The girl looks at her, then points at the water.

Addison is confused, then her mind goes to terrifying conclusions. She stands up and gets a paramedic to stay with the girl before walking to the railings. There are stairs on the other side of the railing, leading into the water. She looks closely, squinting at the surface of the sparking blue water when she sees a dark figure sinking down-- Meredith. She runs down the stairs and leaps into the water without thinking. She grabs ahold of Meredith’s limp body and kicks her legs as hard as she could, gasping when her head pops out into the air. Frantically swimming to the stairs while dragging Meredith along, she screams at the top of her cold lungs. 

“Help! We need help over here!” Addison coughs, having swallowed some water. Derek’s head pops out behind the railing, and when he realizes what has happened, he jumps down and picks up Meredith while Addison lifts herself up. 

Addison’s legs are like jelly from kicking the water, her hands and arms were freezing. Her teeth clattered together and her clothes clung to her body. A paramedic wraps a blanket around her and she runs alongside Derek, who was carrying Meredith.

“What the  _ hell _ happened?” Derek yells, frightened.

Addison shakes her head. “I don’t-- I-- I don’t know, I-- I saw h-- her in the water and-- I--”

Derek puts Meredith onto the stretcher, beginning to perform chest compressions.

“She’s going to be okay. You got to her in time.”

Tears flowed down Addison’s face as she turned to look at Meredith. All the color was drained from Meredith’s face, her lips and fingertips were blue. 

“Dr. Shepherd!” Derek looks up to Dr. Stevens, who was running up to the ambulance. “We need help over there, it’s-- wait, is that Meredith?”

Derek looks around frantically. “Get someone else, Stevens, I’m busy here.”

Izzie speaks up, her eyes still focused on Meredith. “I can’t get anyone else, you’re the only neurosurgeon here. I had to drill a hole into a guy’s skull and I need you to come with me.”

“I’ll-- I’ll go with her,” Addison says to Derek. 

Derek looks surprised, then he looks at Izzie. 

“Sure, sure. I’ll meet you at the hospital, okay?”

Addison nods and jumps in, taking over CPR. Derek closes the ambulance doors and the ambulance starts making its way to the hospital.

\---

The doors open again, this time outside the emergency room of Seattle Grace. Miranda is the first person she sees. 

“Miranda. It’s Grey. It’s Meredith,” Addison breathes heavily.

Dr. Bailey looks panicked, then composes herself.

“Addison, how long has she been down?”

“I- I don’t know. She’s still alive.”

Addison continues chest compressions, her eyes filling up with tears again when she looks at Meredith’s face.

“Addison,” Miranda says sternly. “ _ Addison. _ ”

Addison looks up.

“Okay, look, I need you to help me get her inside. Clear a trauma bay, stat!”   
Addison stands up and makes her way out the ambulance, then jumps on the side of the stretcher as they go into the emergency room.

“Come on, Meredith. Don’t do this. Stay with me…”

\---

Addison is sitting in Meredith’s room, wrapped in a hospital-issued blanket. Richard sent her to dry herself off and change into new clothes after working on Meredith. Addison closes her eyes and listens to the beeping of the machinery, trying to stop the tears that are already running down her face.

“Hey,” a voice croaks.

Addison opens her eyes and green meets blue. Meredith smiles warmly.

“Hey.” Addison wipes her cheek with the sleeve of her shirt. “You had us really worried.”

Meredith chuckles, and Addison feels ten times better already. “I think I died for a second there.”

Addison’s smile fades a bit. “You went into V-fib. We couldn’t get you back for a while, and you were on bypass for about an hour.”

Meredith hums. “I saw Denny. And Dylan. And Doc and Bonnie. And then I saw my mom.”

Addison knits her brows. “While you were…?”

Meredith nods.

“If I saw my mom, it means… my mom is… dead, right?”

Addison sighs. “Yes, I got the news while you were still resting. I’m sorry.”

Meredith nods, her eyes flitting around. Addison gently grabs Meredith’s cold hand, putting it between her warm ones. Meredith looks into Addison’s eyes.

“Thank you for saving me.”

“Of course,” Addison says softly. She leans in closer. “But if you die on me again, I’ll resuscitate you and kill you myself.”

Meredith lets out a loud laugh, and Addison’s heart warms. They sit closely, lost in the moment. 

Meredith studies Addison’s face, and she notices things she hadn’t noticed before. Addison’s left eye is slightly greener than the other. She had a small scar next to her eyebrow, barely noticeable. Meredith wondered how she got it. Her hair was wavy and some strands were clumped together, yet it looked soft. Her eyes were a little puffy from crying. Meredith doesn’t even notice that she’s leaning closer to Addison until their lips hit. And suddenly the world just stops spinning, and it’s just the two of them on the entire planet. Meredith melts inside, which is ironic considering she was hypothermic not too long ago. She only pulls away after feeling a sharp pain in her chest.

Addison snaps out of her state of euphoria, sitting up straight. 

“Are you okay? What hurts?”

Meredith waves her hand. “My chest. It doesn’t hurt anymore, though.”

Addison apologizes, and Meredith is confused.

“Why are you sorry?”

“I did chest compressions on you. I might have gotten too carried away.”

Meredith smiles lopsidedly. “You saved my life, is what you did.”

Addison holds Meredith’s face in her hands and mirrors Meredith’s smile.

“So… you did CPR on me?” Meredith has a smug look on her face.

“Oh, stop it.”

Addison and Meredith laugh together, holding each other’s hand, and the world is warmer again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i remembered that in the actual episode, Addison worked on Meredith after she drowned and it made me so sad. it's 3.16 if anyone wants to rewatch it.


	7. Staying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the delay again! i'm trying to keep up a consistent schedule but i'm just so unproductive these days. hope yall enjoy the chapter! :)

Addison stands by the nurse’s station outside Meredith’s room, checking on her before she leaves for the day. She watched the four interns inside talk and laugh together, eating snacks and talking about how Izzie drilled a hole in some guy’s skull. Meredith catches her eyes briefly, smiles at her, and goes back to talking with Izzie, George, and Cristina. Addison smiles softly and leaves Meredith to spend time with her friends. She makes it to the first floor lobby when a voice stops her.

“Hey.”

Addison looks up from the ground and sees Derek face to face with her. He’s wearing some pants with a thermal shirt tucked in, and he has his jacket hanging from his arm.

“Hi.”

Derek looks over her shoulder. “Is Meredith okay?”

Addison nods. “Thank you, for what you did earlier. I wouldn’t have gotten her out in time without you.”

Derek shrugs. “It was all you.”

They stand in silence, Addison shifting her eyes to the ground again.

“Were you about to leave?” Addison asks.

“Yeah. You?”

“Yes. I should be getting back to New York soon anyway.”

Derek nods. “Well, thank you. For saving Meredith. I know it couldn’t have been easy, considering…” he trails off.

Addison shakes her head. “I’m a doctor. I took an oath. I wouldn’t let my personal life affect that.”

“No, I know.”

Addison looks into Derek’s eyes, searching for an ulterior motive. But all she saw was honesty and… sadness.

“Aren’t you going to see Meredith?”

“I went up there a while ago, she was sleeping and I didn’t want to wake her,” he shrugs.

Addison hums. 

“Well, I should get back to my hotel and get some sleep before my flight.”

Addison’s heart twists. She really,  _ really  _ didn’t want to leave. She considered not saying goodbye to Meredith again-- she already did it once, and the second time wouldn’t make it any less painful. It felt wrong after she and Meredith kissed. Did the kiss even mean anything? 

Addison sighs softly. 

“I hope you and Meredith are happy together. I know I hurt you, but all I ever wanted was for you to be happy.”

She turns to walk away, but Derek puts his hand on Addison’s shoulder. “Wait, actually… we aren’t together anymore.”

Addison’s eyes go wide. 

“She broke up with me, after you finished the case. She came to my trailer to end it.”

Addison is shocked. 

“Oh. I-- I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright. I knew she was going to find out sometime.”

It was wrong of her, but Addison feels... excited? Happy? She couldn’t put a word to it.

“So...you live in a trailer?” she tries to shift the conversation.

Derek rolls his eyes light heartedly. 

“It’s cozy,” is what he says, as if it’s an explanation.

Derek and Addison laughed together for the first time in a long time. Addison missed it. Derek wasn’t just her (now ex) husband. He was her best friend, the person who made her laugh on a stressful day. 

Their laughter soon dies down and leaves them standing together in the middle of the lobby. Derek speaks first.

“You know, there’s a position open in OB. You should take it.”

Addison is confused. “Wh-- why?”

Derek sighs. 

“I know we’re not on good terms, but if you stay, maybe we can patch things up. I know we don’t love each other anymore, not the same way, but it would be good to have my best friend back.”

Addison tears up.

“I’d love that.”

Derek smiles and brings her in for a hug.

Addison sniffs, taking in Derek’s cologne she used to hate  _ so much. _ But now it just reminds her of when everything was good.

Derek breaks their hug. 

“Get home, get some sleep, and you can talk to Richard tomorrow.”

Addison nods. “Thank you.” 

Derek smiles at her again, pats her arm, and walks out the doors.

Addison wipes her tears and follows behind shortly to her hotel.

\---

Collapsing on the bed, Addison looks around at her packed bags on the floor of the hotel room. The lease on the small house she had been renting ended yesterday, and now she is staying in a hotel not too far from the hospital. If she gets the OB/GYN opening at Seattle Grace, she would have to find someplace else to live.  _ I’ll figure that out later.  _ She drifts off into a peaceful sleep.

\---

A ringing from her bedside table jerks her awake in the middle of a nice dream. She blindly reaches for the pager while simultaneously fiddling with the lamp to turn it on. 

**12:04 am**

**_911 Room 140_ **

Dr. M. Grey

Addison frantically leaps out of her bed and runs to the elevator and into her car. Thank god she went to sleep in her day clothes.

Fifteen anticipating minutes later, she makes her way to Meredith’s room and-- everything is fine.

“Are you okay?” Addison nearly yells.

Meredith sits up. “I’m fine,” she says nonchalantly.

Addison scoffs. “You paged me 9-1-1!”

Meredith shushes her. “Shh, people are sleeping.”

“Meredith,  _ I  _ was sleeping. Do you know how terrifying it is to wake up to a 9-1-1 page?”

“I know, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”

Addison tilts her head to one side. “What did you need?”

Meredith bites her lip. “I needed to talk to you.”

Dread fills Addison’s entire body.  _ It’s about the kiss wasn’t it? It was the spur of the moment and she didn’t feel the same way? _

“I, uhm… I broke up with Derek.”

That wasn’t what Addison was expecting. “Uh… I know.”

Meredith has a surprised look on her face. “You do?”

Addison nods. “Yeah, Derek told me, actually. I ran into him when I left a couple hours ago. I’m sorry, by the way.”

Meredith shrugs it off. 

They stare at each other in silence. 

“Why’d you kiss me?” Addison blurts out. By the time her brain caught up with her mouth, it was too late. 

Meredith’s eyes go wide. “Uhm… I don’t know. I like you, I guess.”

_ “I like you?” Was she in middle school? Come on, Meredith, you can do better than that. _

“I… I have feelings… for you.”

_ That was better. _

“Unless, you don’t feel the same.” Meredith stares at her hands, picking at the skin around her fingernails.

Addison grabs Meredith’s hands. “I like you, too.”

Meredith smiles widely, bringing out a smile on Addison, too.

They stay silent, holding hands and staring into each other’s eyes. Meredith gently bites her lip, making Addison blush. 

“On that note, would you like to have dinner sometime? Or we could just get drunk at Joe’s like before,” Addison asks.

Meredith laughs, thinking back to that memory. “Both.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Addison chuckles. “Well, I’d like to stay here with you, but I have to talk to Richard in the morning. I need to get back to the hotel,” Addison says sadly. 

Meredith nods. “I understand. Wait-- you’re staying in a hotel?”

“Yeah, I was supposed to leave yesterday and the lady who owns the house I was renting has already moved back in.”

“Stay at my house.”

Addison pauses. “Skipping a bunch of steps there, don’t you think?”

Meredith waves her hand. “It doesn’t have to mean anything. Hotels are expensive, and you can just stay at my place for free. George and Izzie lives there with me, but I have an extra room.”

Addison makes a mental pros and cons list. Pros… Meredith. Cons, being roommates with  _ interns _ ? She doesn’t want to mix her personal life with her work life. How do Meredith’s friends even feel about her? She has to have told them about the love triangle situation, right?

“I’ll think about it,” she responds.

Meredith flashes a cheeky smile. “Sounds good.”

Addison leaves with a kiss on Meredith’s head. She practically skips her way back to the hotel, and succumbs into a deep, warm sleep.

\---

Addison gets the job. After chatting with Richard for about 20 minutes, he offers it to her right on the spot. Addison feels excited, and she already starts planning to fly to New York to pack some more clothes and belongings. 

She’s on her phone, walking through the hallway when she bumps into someone and their binders come crashing down on the floor. Addison stuffs her phone away in her pocket and bends down, picking up the binders.

“I am so sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was go--” she looks up and is greeted with light blue eyes. 

“Oh, Meredith!” She hands Meredith the stack on binders.

“Addison! How was the interview?” she smiles.

“It went great, I got the job,” Addison grins. “You’re back to work?”

Meredith nods. “Yeah, I was discharged this morning. I’ve been itching to get back to work.”

Addison chuckles. “Well, I’m glad you’re doing okay now. Sorry again, for bumping into you.”

Meredith shakes her head. “It’s alright. Don’t worry about it.”

They stand in silence for a few seconds, neither knowing what else to say. 

“Oh, have you gotten a chance to think about my offer yet?” Meredith asks.

“Yeah, I have.”

“And?”

Addison sighs.  _ What’s the worst that can happen?  _

“Yes. I’d love to.”

Meredith stands up straighter, flashing a bright smile.

“Great! Well, just text me when you can move in, and I’ll-- wait, we still don’t have each other’s numbers,” she adds shyly.

Addison chuckles at the shy demeanor of Meredith. It was cute. She pulls up her contacts and hands the phone to Meredith, who puts in her number.

“I’ll text you and then you can add me later,” Addison takes the phone back.

“Sounds good,” Meredith nods. “Well, I have to do charting, so I’ll text you back later?”

“Yeah. Have a nice day at work,” Addison waves, walking away. 

“Bye.”

Addison makes a new text message to Meredith and she sees that Meredith has put a red heart next to her name on the contact name. She blushes and ends up tripping on the metal threshold near the doors.


	8. Moving In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short chapter, but i didnt want to go too long without posting! school has started again so i dont know when i will start writing the next chapter, but hope you enjoy this one!

A week later, Addison is already back from her home in New York, boxes of her belongings rattling around in the back of her car rental. She makes a note that she needs to buy her own car soon. She pulls up to Meredith’s driveway. It’s a nice house, big, lots of windows. She notices the big window that looks into the living room area and sees Meredith running around, frantically picking stuff off the ground while George and Izzie sit on the couch. 

She smiles excitedly, unbuckling her seatbelt and walking up to the door and knocks. Meredith is there in an instant with her shining blue eyes and warm smile. 

“Hi! Welcome!”

Addison chuckles. “Hi. I’m a bit early, I can come back later though, if you--”

“No, it’s fine,” Meredith assures her. She turns her head to the living room. “George, Izzie, come help us bring in the boxes.”

Addison is pretty sure she hears George mumbling something to Izzie, but Izzie seems unfazed as she hops off the couch and smiles at Addison.

“Hi, Dr. Shepherd.”

Addison waves her off. “You can just call me Addison.”

Izzie nods and agrees before heading down to Addison’s car.

George appears behind Meredith. “Hello.”

Addison offers him a handshake and he accepts. “Hello, George. I’ve heard great things about you.”

George looks at Meredith skeptically. 

“I’ve heard good things about you too. Need any more help with the boxes?”

Addison nods. “Sure, if you don’t mind.”

George gives her a smile and joins Izzie, who is trying to pick up two of the biggest boxes at once.

Meredith smiles. “That went great.”

“You think so?”

Meredith chuckles and gives Addison a push, leading her out to the car to help the other interns.

\---

“This is your room,” Meredith announces as she pushes the door open.

Izzie and George are the first inside, placing the boxes on the floor next to the wall. Addison puts down the suitcase she was carrying with a thud, looking around the room. It’s small, the bed is on a metal frame, pushed against the wall. There is a nightstand next to it, a chair on the other side, and curtains draped over the wide window. It’s smaller than Addison is used to, but she’s grateful she has a place to stay while searching for her own house.

“It’s not fully furnished yet, but I cleaned it and you can put your things in here and make it your own,” Meredith looks at her.

“Thank you,” Addison says. “I can’t express how grateful I am.”

Meredith smiles. “It’s no problem, I--”

A series of pagers go off and the interns share a look at each other.

“I’m so sorry, we got paged. I’ll see you later?” Meredith raises her brows.

Addison nods. “Of course, thank you all for helping. I’ll see you later.”

George and Izzie run out first, the Meredith trails behind them before turning back to give Addison a quick kiss. She grins and runs back out to her room to get ready.

Addison stands in shock for what felt like a year until she hears a car pull out the driveway. She turns around and flops face down onto her bed, overwhelmed (the good kind).


	9. I'm Not Okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i felt like Meredith's storyline with the depression in the earlier seasons wasn't talked about enough on the show. so, i hope this chapter is good, it pained me to write this but it needed to be talked about. 
> 
> cw// depression, drowning

A month has passed by since Addison moved in with Meredith. The first few weeks were rocky due to tension between Addison and the other interns in the house, but it was quickly resolved and they were getting to know each other better. Addison and Derek finalized their divorce, they split their belongings and decided to sell their house in New York since neither one of them was planning to go back. They remain friends and they sometimes eat lunch together on their break, just like they used to. 

Addison and Meredith have been getting closer. They go up to Kerry Park once a week to eat lunch and talk. They talked about anything, and everything. Addison told her about her brother, New York (Meredith’s never been there), and her childhood, and Meredith talked about hers. Meredith had never been big on sharing about her past, but with Addison, she knew she could let her walls down and not be judged for it. Addison made her feel safe and happy.

Which is why it makes no sense when Meredith suddenly feels like crap.

She wakes up and the first thing she notices is a heavy, suffocating feeling in her chest. She takes a few deep breaths to try to resolve the feeling, but it stays. She would do anything to stay in the warmth of her bed and shut out the world right now. But she can’t, because she is a surgeon and lives depend on her right now. Her pager goes off and she grumbles. She reluctantly untangles herself from her comforter and trudges to the bathroom to get ready, and stubs her toe on the leg of her nightstand. 

“Ouch, great.”

\---

Meredith feels the dread settle in even more when she enters the locker room. Alex is teasing Izzie about something, Cristina is talking over the steps to a surgery to George. Meredith rubs her eye, feeling a headache coming on. Cristina comes up next to her locker and says something to her, but Meredith just can’t focus on what she’s saying.

“Mer. Meredith. Meredith.”

Meredith looks at Cristina, dazed.

“Meredith. Are you okay?”

Meredith thinks over her answer. 

“I’m fine.”

Cristina doesn’t seem convinced in the slightest. She opens her mouth to say something else, but is cut off by Bailey.

“Yang, Karev, check in on the patient in room 102, O’Malley, check in with your post-op patient then meet me in room 401, Izzie, go find Dr. Shepherd for your assignment, and Grey, you’re on scut,” Bailey says as she hands out charts. 

Meredith is about to protest, but she doesn’t have the energy to do it. She figures she’ll just power through work and then go straight home to her bed.

\---

It’s just about lunchtime, which is when Addison usually comes looking for her so they could get lunch together. Meredith sees her girlfriend walking into the clinic, looking beautiful as ever, even after doing a surgery for three hours straight. Addison smiles when she spots Meredith.

“Hey, ready for lunch?”

Meredith closes the chart she’s holding. 

“Actually, Bailey wanted me to check in on another patient for her. Maybe another time?”

Addison looks disappointed, but understands. 

“That’s fine… are you okay?”

Meredith exhales. “I’m fine.”

Perhaps she said it too fast, or something about her expression is giving her away, but Addison knits her brows together and studies the younger woman. 

“I’m going to check in on the patient now,” Meredith says before walking away. She doesn’t have to turn around to know that she left Addison confused.  _ Whatever, it doesn’t matter right now. I’ll fix that later. _

Meredith pushes into the first on-call room she sees, and thankfully it was empty. She locks the door and collapses onto the firm mattress, dozing off.

\---

She’s unceremoniously awakened by a loud pounding on the door. She looks at her pager, which has been going off for who knows how long. She unlocks the door.

“Grey, you do  _ not _ miss your pages. Do you know what happens when you miss your pages? People die. You are a doctor, start acting like it,” Bailey said angrily.

Meredith rubs her eyes, feeling another headache coming on. 

“I’m sorry, Bailey. What is it you needed me to do?”

Miranda crosses her arms. “Go home _. _ ”

Meredith makes sure she isn’t hallucinating or hearing things.

“What?”

“ _ Go home, _ Dr. Grey. You are not capable of holding human lives in your hands right now. Go home and rest.”

Meredith nods. “I will. Thank you, Dr. Bailey.”

Miranda nods her head and leaves.

Meredith is out of the hospital in record time and drives home, just about ready to collapse in her bed. Or the floor. Or the driveway, she isn’t sure how far she’ll make it to.

Back at the hospital, Miranda catches up to Addison outside the clinic.

“Shepherd.”

Addison turns around. “Miranda. Oh, it’s Montgomery now, we finalized the divorce.”

“Right, sorry. I need to speak with you.”

Addison nods. “Oh sure, I was just going to find Meredith. I’ll let her know I’m speaking with you.”

Addison turns to go inside, but Miranda stops her. 

“Actually, I sent Grey home about an hour ago.”

Addison makes a “hm” sound and she looks confused. “Why? Did she do something?”

Miranda shakes her head. “She’s not doing very well today. You haven’t noticed?”

Addison pulls Miranda aside.

“I mean, I left early this morning and I didn’t see her until lunch, but she was acting weird in the clinic. Is something wrong with her? What happened?” she rambles.

Miranda holds Addison’s hand to catch her attention. “Montgomery, she is  _ depressed. _ ”

Addison pauses. “What?”

“I know the signs. And Meredith has shown many of them today. Now, I don’t know for sure, but just check in on her. She is not doing well.”

Addison pinches the bridge of her nose. “I… I didn’t… okay. Thank you for telling me, Bailey.”

“Of course. Now go home, call me if you need anything else.”

Addison grabs her bag and leaves. 

\---

Addison closes the door behind her and looks around in the kitchen for Meredith. 

“Meredith?”

Meredith’s bag is tossed aside on the floor, her keys and hospital keycard sat on the kitchen counter. Addison turns around and goes upstairs. 

“Meredith?”

She heads toward Meredith’s bedroom when she sees something out the corner of her eye. She turns around into the bathroom and is shell shocked, to say the least.

Meredith is in the bathtub, her head under the water. Addison jumps forward and pulls Meredith out. Meredith coughs and rubs the water out of her eyes. 

“Meredith! What the hell are you doing?”

Meredith stares at her dumbfoundedly. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

Addison scoffs. “You didn’t answer my question.”

Meredith looks down at her hands. 

“Just… taking a bath.”

Addison isn’t sure what to say. Adrenaline is pumping through her veins, her heartbeat is loud and fast. 

“Meredith, please be honest with me… are you okay?”

Meredith stays silent. That alone was enough of an answer for Addison. She sits up and rolls up her soaked sleeves and grabs Meredith’s shampoo. 

“What are you doing?” Meredith asked, her voice quiet.

“Sh, it’s okay. You’re okay.” Addison begins washing Meredith’s hair, gently massaging her scalp. They both take their time, then Addison helps Meredith to bed. 

“I’m not okay,” Meredith whispers while they cuddle on the bed. 

“I know. What can I do to help?”

Meredith shakes her head. “I don’t want to bother you with this.”

Addison’s taken aback.

“Hey,” Addison pulls Meredith face to face with her. “You could  _ never _ bother me with your feelings. I care about you, I care about your feelings. You can  _ always _ talk to me.”

“It’s just so hard,” Meredith’s voice breaks. “Getting out of bed is hard. Going to work is hard.I can’t find the motivation to do the smallest things. I thought I was okay, I’ve  _ been _ okay for so long, I don’t know why it’s hitting me  _ now _ .”

Addison hugs Meredith tightly. “Sometimes there isn’t a reason for it. And it sucks. But I’ll always be here when you’re ready,” Addison kissed her head.

Meredith pulls Addison closer. 

In conclusion, today wasn’t a good day. Meredith didn’t like being vulnerable. But having Addison by her side made it so much easier, because she knew she’d never have to go through it alone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just to clarify-- yes, Miranda knows Addison and Meredith are dating. because she's Bailey, and she knows everything ;)


	10. Candlelit Dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my mental health is sh!t so i think i'm going to be taking a break from writing for a bit. Here's a soft and kinda funny chapter to make up for it. love you all <3

A week has flown by and a lot has already changed. After a lot of talking, Meredith decided she needed to go to therapy. She visits the hospital’s psychiatrist once a week after her shift is over, and Addison waits until she’s done to pick her up and go back home. 

Addison, George, and Izzie have been getting really close, and when Meredith gets home after them, she sometimes eavesdrops from another room to listen to the three of them interact and laugh together. Not that she’d admit it. 

Addison and Meredith have been getting really close, too. They go on dates whenever they can, or they go to the park to talk and enjoy the view. Sometimes, Meredith sneaks into Addison’s room at night because she doesn’t want to feel lonely. Addison is perfectly content with it. They are still keeping their relationship a secret, with the exception of Izzie, George, and Dr. Bailey. They had their suspicions that Derek knew, but if he did, he certainly wasn’t making it obvious. Meredith and Derek mended things over for the sake of their work dynamic, and Addison is still friends with him.

Long story short, everything was going really well. There was this one incident where Meredith flushed her mother’s ashes down the sink in a scrub room and freaked Addison out, but other than that, life felt really good. 

One quiet night, Addison and Meredith are cuddled on the couch, watching a romantic movie. Of course, it being Meredith and Addison, they made fun of the cheesy romantic tropes throughout the entire movie. 

“Come on, with the cliches! Where’s the originality?” Addison whined at the TV. Meredith laughs and throws popcorn at Addison’s head. Addison chuckles and lightly taps Meredith’s nose. 

“I have to admit… the candlelit dinner was really sweet,” Meredith gushed.

Addison hums and smiles. She had a plan.

After the movie ended, Meredith went straight to bed. “I have a surgery tomorrow,” she said. Addison let her go, but not before giving her a goodnight kiss. That night, Addison stayed up to plan out a candlelit dinner for Meredith. She had an off-day the next day, so it was the perfect time to set up before Meredith got home. She knew that George was staying over at Callie’s, and Izzie was staying at the hospital to keep an eye on a patient.

Meredith leaves the next morning after breakfast and Addison gets to work. She cleaned up the house and pushed the furniture to the sides in the living room, then set up a small round table in the middle. She rummaged through the storage closet and pulled out a white tablecloth, perfect size for the table. She settles on spaghetti carbonara, red wine, and sourdough bread and makes a trip to the grocery store. 

It was nearing the end of Meredith’s shift when Addison finished cooking and setting up the table. She had on light makeup and got dressed up in a tight black dress and pulled her hair into a low ponytail. Of course, that’s when she realized she didn’t have candles set up. For a candlelit dinner. 

“Oh… crap.”

Addison runs around the house, into every storage closet, every cupboard, every room. After a hasty search of the house, Addison finds a pack of once used birthday candles and an obviously electric tea light-- that’s missing its batteries.

In defeat, she takes the pack of birthday candles into the kitchen and pulls out a rectangular plate. She melts off some of the wax on the bottom of the candles to stick it onto the plate before lighting them up. Addison grumbles and puts the plate on the side of the table. Addison looks over at the door when she hears it open. 

“Hey, I’m home. Where ar-” Meredith stops.

Addison smiles warmly. “Hi.”

Meredith is… she doesn’t know  _ what _ she’s feeling. She hears Addison chuckle and pull on her wrist. 

“Surprise,” Addison presses a kiss to Meredith’s cheek. Meredith smiles affectionately. 

“Wow, you… you did all this for me?”

“Of course I did. You said you liked the candlelit dinner from the movie yesterday, and I wanted to surprise you. I also heard that your surgery went well, so we also have something to celebrate.”

Meredith stares lovingly into Addison’s eyes. “How did you hear that?”

Addison shrugs. “I have my sources.”

Meredith sets her bag down and pulls Addison into a kiss. 

“Thank you so much.”

Addison gave her another peck and led her to the table. Meredith sits down and something catches her eye.

“Are those… birthday candles?”

Addison laughs nervously. “I uh, I couldn’t find any tea lights. And by the time I remembered, it was too late to go out and buy some.”

Meredith’s laughs made Addison’s heart jump in her chest.

“It’s perfect. You’re perfect.”

“No,  _ you _ are.”

Their dinner goes very well. They talked about the surgery Meredith got to scrub in on, how the interns had a hotdog eating contest during lunch. Addison shared about how she nearly set the kitchen on fire while baking the bread and ended up buying a pre-made loaf of it from a bakery. Sometimes, they just sat quietly and stared into each other’s eyes. 

Meredith sat at the table sipping her wine while watching Addison clear the table, “because you had a long surgery and you deserve a break,” she had said.

Once Addison was done, Meredith links her hand with Addison’s and heads for her room.

“Come on, let’s go to bed.”

Addison nods. “Are you tired?”

Meredith turns around and smiles playfully.  _ “I never said anything about sleeping.” _

Addison raises her eyebrows and picks up Meredith over her shoulder, Meredith laughing the whole time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got a prompt for this from tumblr, i can't remember who wrote it, but let me know if you know who did it first!


	11. "That went well."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm alive! happy valentine's day, i hope this sweet chapter makes up for my absence. i wrote this in 30 minutes so it's not that great, but i really love this chapter! let me know what you think <3

Addison wakes up, noticing she was having trouble breathing. She looks down and immediately figures out why. Meredith was cuddled up, her head resting on top of Addison’s chest while her legs were wrapped around Addison’s. Like a koala. Addison chuckles quietly, not disturbing the blonde.

Addison never thought she’d be in this position. Almost three months ago, she was called to Seattle for one surgery, where she also confronted her then-husband and his mistress. Fast forward, she has a permanent contract with Seattle Grace Hospital, she’s divorced, and dating her husband’s ex-girlfriend. Sure, it was a little messed up, but Addison felt happy, and that’s good enough for her.

Derek was still unaware of Meredith and Addison’s relationship, and it made Addison feel guilty. She had a few short conversations with Meredith about it, but they kept putting it off. It wasn’t like she could casually bring up, “Hey, remember the girl you were screwing while we were separated? Well, I’m dating her now,” into a conversation, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t hard for either of the women to not blurt it out whenever they talked to Derek. 

Meredith makes a small noise, pulling Addison away from her thoughts. Addison smiles.

“Hey, sleeping beauty.”

Meredith looks up and tightens her arms around Addison’s torso.

“Good morning.”

Addison melts at Meredith's raspy morning voice.

“We need to head in soon,” Addison looks over at the clock.

Meredith drops her head. “Nooo, five more minutes.”

Addison strokes Meredith’s hair. “We’re going to be late. I don’t want you to get in trouble with Bailey.”

“She’s your friend, can’t you make her let it slide?”

Addison laughs. 

“Sorry, bubs. Come on, up up up.”

She pulls Meredith to her feet before wrapping her in a hug.

“Bubs” was a pet name Addison had for Meredith. “Because ‘babe’ is too overused,” Meredith retorted while they were talking about pet names. So after an unnecessarily long conversation, Meredith was “bubs” and Addison was “darling”. Simple, but affectionate.

Fifteen minutes later, they are running out the door. Meredith bumps her head while climbing in the car, an audible  _ thump _ being heard. Addison lets out a small laugh, feeling bad when Meredith pouts and rubs her head. Addison apologizes and peppers her face with kisses. 

Halfway to the hospital, Addison breaks the comfortable silence. 

“Do you think we should tell Derek?”

Meredith tears her gaze away from the window.

“Today?”

Addison nods. 

“I mean, only if you’re comfortable. I just-- I mean, it’s been three months. He deserves to know.”

Meredith takes this into consideration for a couple minutes. 

“Yeah, you’re right. I just don’t know how he’ll react. I mean, we work with him. What if he hates us?”

Addison takes her right hand off the steering wheel and puts it on top of Meredith’s hand. 

“Mer, you don’t know that he’ll hate us. I know we all have history, and it’ll be awkward for a while, but then he’ll get over it. We’ll be fine,” she reassures.

Meredith nods. 

“Thanks, darling.”

“Of course.”

\---

It’s almost the end of their shift when Meredith and Addison make a plan to meet with Derek in the stairwell. It was the only time they could all meet, due to Derek and Meredith both being preoccupied with a patient for most of the day. 

Addison focuses on her breathing, pacing around. Her footsteps echo in the long stairwell. A door opens, revealing Meredith and Derek behind it.

‘So, what did you need to-- Addison? What are you doing here too?” Derek’s eyebrows rose.

Meredith clears her throat, glancing at Addison. 

“We, uhm… We need to talk… about… something.”

Derek chuckles. 

“Well, I got that part when you asked me to meet you here. What is it?”

Meredith stays silent, glancing at Addison again. Addison seems to get the message.

“Well, there’s something you need to know,” Addison speaks. “And you might not like it.”

Derek looks back and forth between Meredith and Addison.

“Okay…”

Addison inhales slowly. 

“Meredith and I have been seeing each other.”

A silence fills the room-- er, stairwell. Derek is staring at Addison like she grew a second head, meanwhile Meredith seems to be looking at anything but the other two people. Addison picks at the skin around her thumbnail.

“Romantically,” Addison clarifies, then internally cringes at herself.

Derek nods slowly. 

“Yes, I… understood. Is-- is that all?”

Meredith looks up. 

“Uh, yeah. That’s all,” she speaks for the first time.

Derek’s shoulders sag.

“Okay, I thought you were going to say something bad,” he chuckles.

Addison is dumbfounded. 

“That’s all? You’re not mad?”

Derek shakes his head. 

“No, why would I be mad? I mean, we’re divorced, and we’re not dating anymore,” he gestures between the two women. “So… I mean, I  _ am _ a little shocked, but yeah, I’m okay with it.”

Addison laughs, relieved. Derek pulls Meredith in for a hug, then Addison. 

He smiles widely. 

“I’m happy for you two.”

“Thank you,” Meredith speaks softly, making eye contact with Addison. 

“Well, I have to go finish up some paperwork for a patient, I’ll see you both tomorrow,” Derek turns to leave.

“Wait, do you want me to do it? She was my patient, too,” Meredith stops him.

“No, no, don’t worry about it. I can handle it, go home and get some rest. You did really well in the OR today.”

Meredith nods, grinning. 

“Thank you. Goodnight, Dr. Shepherd.”

“Goodnight, Dr. Grey, Dr. Montgomery.”

“Goodnight,” Addison nods.

Derek leaves, the door closing behind him. Meredith pulls Addison into a kiss. 

“That went well.”

“What did I tell you?” Addison smirks, kissing her again.

“Okay, smartass. Let’s go home.”

They walk hand-in-hand up one flight of stairs, only letting go when the door opens into the patients’ floor. They share a quick glance before going off to their respective locker rooms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have somethings planned for the next chapters and you might hate me for it. *dun dun dunnn*


	12. "I Never Break My Promises"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The timeline is hard to follow, sorry about that but here is what I have so far:
> 
> -Meredith and Derek dated a month after she started the internship (This story starts in March 2008, so this would be April '08)  
> -Addison met Meredith during Meredith's 7th month as an intern (Oct '08)  
> -Addison stayed in Seattle for one week for the TTTS case, but decides to stay.  
> -Ferry boat crash/ Meredith's drowning happened the week after that (7.5 months, mid-Oct '08).  
> -A couple days after the drowning, Meredith is still in the hospital. She and Addison start dating from there and Addison moves in with Meredith one week after she is released from the hospital (8 months interning)  
> -When Addison and Bailey talk after Bailey sent Meredith home from work, it is 9 months into Meredith's internship, 2 months dating (Dec '08)  
> -Late January '09, Addison and Meredith have their candlelit dinner. This would be about 3 months of them dating  
> -Meredith is finishing her 11th month of the internship, she has been dating Addison for 3 months. This is when they tell Derek about their relationship (February)  
> -This chapter (the one you're about to read) is March '09. So it's been a year of the internship, Addison and Meredith has been dating for 4-ish months. 
> 
> sorry for the confusing timeline, if it's any consolation, i'm just as lost as you are.

**_A month later…_ **

Things were going surprisingly well. Derek was okay with Addison and Meredith’s relationship.  _ Very _ okay, in fact. He started dating Rose, a scrub nurse. Addison and Meredith were shocked, to say the least, but the trio were happy with their situations. Derek joined in on Addison and Meredith’s lunch breaks every chance he got, and they often worked together in the OR.

Of course, not everything was sunshine and rainbows. A deceased patient’s husband, Gary Clark, filed a lawsuit against Derek. The lawsuit was soon dropped since Gary had no case, and the hospital only acted in accordance with the patient’s advanced directive.

The whole ordeal was put to rest… or so they thought.

\---

“Good morning, Dr. Shepherd,” Meredith smiled as she passed Derek in the halls.

“Morning, Dr. Grey,” Derek nodded in return.

It was a great day. Today was the day Meredith was finally going to say, “I love you” to Addison. She had a whole plan-- a fancy dinner, a walk around Kerry Park, and then meet at Joe’s bar where they first hung out. She was nervous, but also excited. She knew it was too soon, but she couldn’t mask her feelings anymore. She only hoped that Addison felt the same.

\---

Addison steps into the elevator, on her way to meet up with Meredith. A tall, older man wearing a crinkly beige jacket steps in after her. 

“Good morning,” Addison offers a friendly smile.

“Mornin’,” he says gruffly. “Could you tell me where to find Dr. Shepherd?”

“He’s, uh, probably around the halls somewhere. He had an early surgery, but he should be done by now. I can find him for you, if you’d like?”

The man shakes his head. 

“I’ll find him myself. Thank you.”

“Mm-hmm.”

They stand in silence before the doors open and he steps out. He stops and looks in her direction.

“Have a nice day.”

“You too,” Addison smiles, then follows behind and goes in the opposite direction.

\---

“Hey.”

Addison comes up behind Meredith in the empty hallway and wraps her arms around Meredith, kissing her neck.

Meredith turns around, grinning. 

“Hey, darling.”

Their lips meet, both of them smiling into the kiss.

“So, I have a surprise for you later.”

Addison raises her brows.

“Oh, really? What kind of surprise?”

Meredith chuckles. 

“It’s not a surprise if I tell you.”

“Well, I’m looking forward to it.”

Both their pagers go off.

“Lockdown?” Meredith looks at Addison.

“Yeah. You think it’s a drill?”

Meredith hums to herself. 

“I don’t know. But nobody in, nobody out. I guess we’re stuck here.”

“She says, disappointedly,” Addison adds.

Meredith squeezes Addison’s face with her hand.

“You’re silly. Let’s go see what’s happening.”

“Hey, lovebirds.”

Addison and Meredith look up to see Cristina making her way over.

“Hi, did you get the alert too?”

Cristina nods.

“Yeah, it’s probably just a drill. Maybe a psych patient got out. Or a baby was taken from the nursery. Ooh, or there’s an ax murderer on the loose.”

Addison chimes in. “Ax murderer would be fun.”

Meredith laughs, lightly hitting Addison’s arm.

A bang rings out in the distance, not too loud but loud enough to be noticed. The three doctors look in the direction of the source.

“What was that?” Meredith grabs Cristina and Addison’s arms.

“Was that a--” Addison whispers.

“--gunshot?” Cristina finishes.

The three of them share a look with each other, then Addison stands up and walks away.

“Where are you going?” Meredith chases after her, Cristina dragging along.

“I’m going to see what’s happening.”

“Are you crazy?” Cristina looks at Addison puzzledly.

“If that was a gunshot, we need to go help. Someone could be hurt.”

“Or we could all die, too,” Meredith whispers.

Addison gives Meredith a pleading look.

Meredith sighs exasperatedly. 

“Fine, let’s go.”

The three women walk out. It was eerily quiet, not something expected inside a hospital. Meredith stands in the middle with Cristina on her left and Addison on her right. Addison and Meredith’s hands are linked while Cristina holds onto Meredith’s left arm.

They turn a corner and are frightened by Derek.

“God-- Derek! What are you doing?” Addison exclaims.

“What are  _ you _ doing? We’re on lockdown.”

“Well, we’re not walking  _ outside _ ,” Cristina says.

“You’re supposed to stay  _ where you are,”  _ Derek pushes the three of them into a storage closet.

“What’s going on?” Meredith whispers.

“There’s a shooter on the loose in the hospital,” Derek says in a low voice.

“That’s what that was? A gunshot?”

“Yes, it was on the main floor by the nurse’s station.  _ Stay. Here. _ I’ll come get you later.”

He shuts the door without another word.

Meredith looks at Cristina worriedly.

“Where’s Izzie and Alex and George?”

Cristina shrugs.

“I- I don’t know. I saw Alex getting into an elevator on the fourth floor but I don’t know where Izzie and George are.”

Meredith grabs Addison’s shoulder. 

“We need to find them.”

Addison’s eyes widened. 

“Mer, they’re probably fine. They’re probably just hiding somewhere.”

“But what if they’re not? They’re my friends, I can’t lose them. I can’t.”

Addison looks at Cristina for help, but Cristina looks just as panicked.

“Okay, let’s go. Be quiet, and stay behind me at  _ all times _ ,” she orders the interns.

\---

Derek is running as quietly as he can through the hall. Richard ordered the lockdown, but is now nowhere to be found. Derek had just finished his morning surgery when the lockdown was called. He told Rose to hide with their patient in her room so she could check on her progress. 

After Derek pushes Addison, Cristina, and Meredith into the storage closet, he runs to the catwalk, where he runs into Gary Clark.

“Mr. Clark, you shouldn’t be here. It’s not safe. You need to go hide.”

Gary walks closer. Derek has a twisty feeling in his gut.  _ Something is wrong. _

“I know it’s not safe here. That’s the point. This hospital isn’t safe.”

“Mr. Clark, I’m sorry. There’s a situation here and you need to go somewhere safe so you don’t get hurt.”

“I’m already hurt,” Gary says angrily. He pulls out his gun, aiming it at Derek’s head.

“You hurt me when you decided to kill my wife.”

_ ‘My whole life flashed through my eyes.’  _ It’s a cliche, really. But in this moment, when Derek is staring down the barrel of a gun, he thinks about his mom. His sisters. His dad, who was once in the same situation as Derek was in this moment. He thought of Meredith. Addison. Rose.

\---

Addison walks quickly into the open room, two sets of footsteps behind her. Addison stops abruptly, the two interns crashing into her back.

“What? What’s happen--” Meredith follow’s Addison’s line of sight. Cristina gasps quietly.

Fifty feet away, Derek is standing on the receiving end of the gun, with Gary Clark holding his finger on the trigger. 

“Oh my god,” Meredith makes a move to run to Derek, but Cristina holds her back. 

“Sh, sh…” Cristina tugs Meredith further away. 

Addison tears her gaze away from Derek, turning to the interns who had tears in their eyes.

“Sh, it’s going to be okay. Get behind the desk.”

Addison pushes them behind the nurse’s desk, whispering assurances to them. She was also trying to reassure herself, too. 

Meredith begins to cry, all the emotions hitting her in this moment. Cristina is hugging Meredith from behind, a single tear falling from her eye, too. Addison’s heart twists. She felt so grateful for Cristina and Meredith’s unbreakable bond. They were two peas in a pod, despite only meeting a year ago when they started the internship.

Addison peeks her head up from behind the desk to see what was happening. Mr Clark, who she knew from hearing about Meredith’s surgery on his wife, was in a heated one-sided conversation with Derek. Derek talks every now and then, but he just listens. Addison sees the door to the catwalk open in her periphery.

“Dr. Shepherd, I--” Izzie cuts off.

Meredith seems to hear, as she breaks from Cristina’s grip and sits up and looks. 

“Izzie? Oh my god-- Cristina.”

Cristina observes the scene.

“What is she doing?!” she whispers forcefully.

The three women watch helplessly as Izzie pleads with Gary. Finally, after five minutes, he lets her go. Izzie runs back through the doors in the direction she originally came from. All that’s left is Derek and Gary.

Meredith begins to hyperventilate, her hand resting over her mouth.

“Oh, god. I’m going to throw up.”

Addison pulls out the trash bin from underneath the desk.

“Here. Meredith, look at me.”

When Meredith doesn’t respond, Addison puts her hand under Meredith’s chin.

“Bubs.”

Meredith looks into Addison’s green eyes.

“We’re going to be okay. I promise you,” Addison shifts her gaze to Cristina. “And I never break my promises.”

Cristina nods. Meredith pulls Addison in for a kiss. 

“ _ I love you _ .”

Addison is caught off-guard, but she doesn’t hesitate. 

“I love you more.”

Meredith smiles. 

“Impossible.”

A gunshot rings out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think for future stories, i am going to finish writing it and upload all the chapters in one go, that way, you won't have to wait for me to update. what are your thoughts on that? let me know and hope you like this chapter :)


	13. "I love you more." "Impossible."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i take so long to update, i'm currently sucked into writing some essays for school and i've also started writing another series. thanks for your patience!

A gunshot rings out.

Addison froze in shock. Meredith and Cristina watched helplessly as Derek’s limp body fell to the ground, an enlarging puddle of blood contrasting the white floors. Gary falls back a couple steps, before turning around and running away.

Meredith attempts to squirm out of Cristina’s grasp, whimpering.

“No, no, no. Meredith, stay still. Stay still,” Cristina tightens her hold.

“Hey,” Addison puts her hand on Meredith’s pale face. “Stay here. Do not move.”

“Why? Where are you-- Addison. Addison!” Meredith raises her voice as Addison runs to the catwalk.

When she stands just a few feet away from Derek’s body, she suddenly becomes nauseous. As a surgeon, she’s seen her fair share of blood. She’s used to it. But apparently, the rules don’t apply to seeing your best friend and ex-husband bleed out on the dirty hospital floor.

“Derek,” Addison presses her hands on the gunshot wound. “Hey, hey, look at me. Open your eyes.”

Derek’s blue eyes open to meet with Addison’s. 

“What are you doing here? Get out before he shoots you, too.”

“I’m not going anywhere. You’re going to be okay. I promise.”

Derek coughs.

“You shouldn’t make promises to patients. That’s protocol,” Derek weakly jokes. Addison chuckles sadly.

“I know. But you’re going to be okay.”

“Okay. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Addison hears footsteps coming closer. She holds her breath as the door opens, and--

It’s just Meredith.

_ Wait, Meredith? _

“Mer, I told you to stay where you were,” Addison hissed, though not in a mean way.

“How could you expect me to sit and do nothing while one of ours is bleeding out in his own workplace?” Meredith sat down besides Derek. Cristina runs up behind her.

“I called the police. Th-they’re not going to get here in time,” Cristina informs.

Derek groans, his eyes closing.

“Derek,” Meredith shook his shoulder. “No, you stay awake. Stay awake. Derek, wake up, stay awake. You better stay awake.”

Addison has never seen Meredith like this before. Her body and hands were shaking, her breathing was uneven, pure panic in her voice.

“I’ll be right back,” Cristina says before running away.

“Cristina!” Addison yells, but she’s already gone.

\---

Cristina runs through the hallway, grabbing a wheelchair. She turns around, meeting Izzie, whose shoes were soaked in blood.

“Izzie, come on. We’re taking Derek down to the OR,” Cristina whispers. Izzie remains frozen. 

“Teddy, sh-she’s in the OR. She can save him, come on.”

Izzie makes eye contact with Cristina.

“I saw on ‘Oprah’ somewhere that if you tell them personal details about yourself, they’re less likely to kill you.”

“Stevens,” Cristina was running out of patience. “Get up. Come on. Come on.”

She grabs Izzie’s hands and pulls her up. The two make their way back to the catwalk.

\---

A few floors below, Alex, George, and Bailey are in a conference room. George lies on the table while Alex pressed some wads of gauze on his bullet wound.  “Is he dead?” Bailey asks as she unpacks the medical cart. 

“He’s unconscious. Vitals are tanking,” Alex breathes. “There’s nothing more we can do.”

“Shut up, don’t-- don’t say that,” Bailey shuts him up. “Don’t die. O’Malley, please don’t die.”

“Where’s… Izzie?” George croaks.

“I don’t know,” Bailey whispers. “But she’s okay. You’re going to be okay, too.”

“Alex?” George looks up. 

“Yeah, dude,” Alex says softly.

“I know-- I know you don’t like me, but um… You’re my friend. I need you to promise me something.”

Alex does something unexpected. He tears up, even sniffling. Bailey could only stay quiet and watch the two interns.

“If I die, promise me you’ll watch after Izzie.”

“You’re not going to die.”

“But if I do, just take care of her. Please. Please?”

“Okay. I promise.”

“Thanks, Alex. Thank you.”

“No problem, George. Sorry for picking on you all the time.”

“It’s alright, I have brothers. I’m used to that sort of thing.”

“Still, you don’t deserve it. You’re a better person than I am.”

George smiles weakly. “I know.”

Alex laughs, blinking away his tears. 

Bailey holds George’s hand, his other hand wrapped around Alex’s. And so they waited in the conference room in silence, waiting for this nightmare to be over.

\---

“Mer, Addison, you, um, you prep him. And Izzie and I are gonna go find Teddy. She should still be on this floor,” Cristina ordered.

“Okay,” Meredith and Addison chimed in.

“Okay, everything is gonna be fine. Okay? I promise.”

Meredith nods as Izzie and Cristina run out the door. Addison goes over to Derek.

“Okay, they’re gonna go find Teddy. It’s gonna be okay,” Addison puts her hand on Derek’s shoulder.

“It’s gonna be okay,” Meredith repeats after Addison. “It’s gonna be okay.”

Derek breathes heavily.

“Okay. I’m not gonna die, I promise. Hey,” Derek looks at Addison. “How many floors did we go down?”

“Two, why?”

“Rose should be on this floor. Can you find her for me?”

Addison nods. “Of course. Meredith, are you good here?”

Meredith looks at her with wide eyes.

“What? No, you’re not going anywhere.”

“That’s what I told you, but you didn’t listen, did you?”

Meredith purses her lips.

“Fine. Come back safely, please.”

“I promise.”

Meredith walks over to Addison, planting a strong kiss on her lips. Addison smiles.

“I love you, bubs.”

“I love you more.”

“Impossible.”

With that, Addison leaves Meredith in the OR with Derek. 

_ “Please, let them be okay,”  _ she whispers to herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know Teddy wasn't here during their intern years, but i don't like Burke (or Isaiah for that matter) so he won't be a part of this storyline. thanks for reading!


End file.
